another 365days of suffering........................

.. doctor say ive another 1year to go...
F*.. what the hell did i do in my past to deserve this suffering...

i wish i could be strong...
but its just 2 much...
maybe i should start to meditate...
maybe god ask me to see myself away from being with my body...
go on a destiny of a detachment..
detachment with peace of mind...
detachment away from life desire...
detachment from ALL DESIRE.
reminding me of suffering and death ...
reminding me of cycle of life...

i wish i would understand which path i should follow...

shall i try to be a monk? maybe i can detach myself from my suffering...
god.. why use this way to enlighten me?....
isnt there any better way?....

how to convert pdf to grayscale in linux

Two commands:

1) pdf2ps -sDEVICE=psgray filename.pdf
2) ps2pdf filename.ps

filename.pdf is now grayscale

Chinese Food Cart

Reminding myself:

Dietary imbalances or extremes will negatively effect the organs and the qi. An excessively stimulating diet, for example, will stimulate body processes, triggering infinite variations of inflamation, fever, hyperactivity, or hormonal abnormalities. Such patterns appear as fevers, sweats, insomnia, hyperthyroid, inflamatory skin conditions, etc,. These conditions will be worsened by over-consumption of foods considered "hot", stimulating, or yang in nature. Overstimulated people may benefit from foods that are considered "cool", "calming", or "yin". Conversely, those who have cold, or "yang deficient" conditions such as low blood pressure, hypersomnia, sciatica, hypothyroid, Hashimoto's complex, etc., may do better with a more stimulating (yang) diet. Keep in mind, when altering your diet, that moderation rules. Changes are most sustainable when they are introduced gradually.
STIMULATING (Yang)	NEUTRAL	CALMING (yin)
Apricots* Artichoke Basil Beef* Black tea Butter Butterfish Carp* Cayenne Celery* Cherries Chestnuts Chicken Chili Cinnamon Chives Coconut Coconut milk Cod Coffee Coriander Dates Egg, yolk Fennel Garlic Ginger Goose* Grapes* Green onion Ham Lamb Malt Mussels Mustard Mustard Greens Nectarine Oats Olives Onions Oolong tea Parsley Peach Pepper Pinapple* Pine nut Plums* Safflower Shrimp Soy oil Sugar, brown Sweet potato Turkey Turmeric Vinegar Walnuts Wine * Classified in some texts as stimulating and in others as neutral	Almonds Apples** Art i c ho k e, Jerusalem Art i c ho k e Beans, Kidney** Bean sprouts Beets Black mushrooms Blueberries Cabbage Carrots Catfish Cauliflower Carob Cheese Clams** Coconut Oil Corn Currant Eel Figs Guava Grits Honey Huckleberries Mackrel Maple Syrup Milk Nutmeg Okra Olive Oil Papaya Peanuts Pecans Perch Pinto Beans Pork Potatoes Pumpkin Seeds Quail Raisin* Rice Sardines Sesame seeds Shark Shitake Mushroom Sugar, white Strawberries String bean Sturgeon Tapioca Taro Turnip Vanilla Whitefish Winter squash Yam Yogurt	Abalone Agar Banana Barley Beer Beans** Beancurd** Bran Buckwheat Cottage cheese Crab Cucumber Duck** Eggplant Egg, white Frog's Legs Gluten Kelp Lettuce Lotus Root Malt Mango Marrow Melon Millet Mulberries Mung Beans Mushrooms Octopus Oysters Pears Peas Persimmons Pumpkin Rabbit Rock salt Rhubarb Seaweed Sesame oil** Snails Spirulina Sugar, cane Summer squash Sunflower seeds Tangerine Tea, green Tofu Tomato Water Chestnut Watercress Watermelon Wheat Wheatberries Wheat germ White fungus * *Classified in some texts as calming and in others as neutral

Reference:
https://www.drshen.com/foodasmedicine.htm

house price in copenhagen vs malaysia

apartment without lift (copenhagen) vs malaysia with lift (puchong)

price: 225k myr vs 706k myr
size: 1236sqr ft vs 485sqr ft..

wow!
thats like 3 x 2, almost 6 times more!

my dear favorite wasabi

Ouuushii...
definitely not my wasabi plate ><

So far, sushi yo not bad :) lots of vege choices.. but doesnt seems to suit my dear dear seafood appetite much...

Going online via nokia e71 through 3G!

I've been trying out blueman bluetooth with the 3G dial up and learned that its very instable. So i decided to switch to the usb cable which came with my phone.

I've stumble upon some blog talking about how to connect to their 3G provider.
I've reconfigured the configuration to suit maxis 3G setting.

1st:
Install wvdial: sudo apt-get install wvdial
2nd:
edit /etc/wvdial.conf
with the code below:

[Dialer Defaults]
Phone =
Username =
Password =
New PPPD = yes

[nokia]
Baud = 3600000
Dial Command = ATDT
Init2 = AT &F E0 V1 &D2 &S0 &C1 S0=0 +CGDCONT=1,"IP","","",0,0
Phone = *99#
Username = maxis
Password = 123
Stupid Mode = 1
Auto DNS = 1
New PPPD = yes


[Dialer nokia-usb]
Inherits=nokia
Modem=/dev/ttyACM0
Modem Type = USB Modem

3rd, to dial,
wvdial nokia-usb

tada! done.

god, where r u ?

Hm... i stumble upon an advise where i learned it the hard way, and so did my colleague who did learned it the hard way too..
"when you are waiting/hoping for someone to accomplish a goal for you, the best person in the end is always you"

its very true when the person is not part of the team.
often we need to find this type of person before we encounter those project/problem, but if we didnt have him/her/them at disparate moment, that person would be "yourself".

So here goes, "god, where r u?"
he is right there, "you!"
If you need help, u ask for him/her.
God is within you. He/she will listen to your every prayers and request. But you will have to take action and work towards your dream.

I asked for help, and my friend hong lead me to my saviour. So now, i would do the same as Hong, i shall be god's hand to spread the news to everyone about this cure.